Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor - Page 27 - Antsmarching.org Forums

Go Back   Antsmarching.org Forums > General Discussion > Eso Si Que EsC > Epic Threads


Want to hide all ads on Ants? Click here
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-23-2016, 08:40 AM   #781
Beefsteak1138
Shut the fuck up Howell
 
Beefsteak1138's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 74,014

Shows Seen: 10

Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

Quote:
Originally Posted by So_bareandempty View Post
holy shit.
I just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer, shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you, rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one, changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice, played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open, called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote

  • Want to hide all ads on Ants? Click here
  • Old 05-31-2016, 03:03 PM   #782
    rconverse
     
    rconverse's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Location: It's how, not where. I live to dance!
    Posts: 68,025

    Shows Seen: 25

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Beefsteak1138 View Post
    I just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer, shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you, rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one, changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice, played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open, called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.
    Never gets old.
    __________________
    Official **TTTSS(NPA:NT)** Record: W - ∞, L - 1
    rconverse is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 08-14-2016, 02:49 AM   #783
    Sabres914
     
    Sabres914's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jul 2008
    Location: San Diego, CA
    Posts: 5,207

    Shows Seen: 69

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    I just had way too much fun backreading this thread - and I survived. Thank you ALL!
    __________________
    @DSims3 - DMBAlmanac Show Stats
    Sabres914 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 08-16-2016, 10:58 AM   #784
    Ascf33
    Pure Class
     
    Join Date: Jul 2003
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    Posts: 37,968

    Shows Seen: 21

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    best thread
    Ascf33 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 08-23-2016, 01:13 AM   #785
    Tantricle
     
    Join Date: Aug 2016
    Posts: 3

    Shows Seen: 0

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Beefsteak1138 View Post
    Some douchy asshat in my neighborhood is pissing me off and I need suggestions on ways to mess with him/her.

    On trash pickup days, after the garbage men have come, this person always takes my trash can and puts it in front my door. This person does this to "remind" me that we're not allowed to leave our trash cans out on the street overnight.

    How can I mess with this guy? I was thinking something like wiping dog shit on the handles of the trash can or something along those lines. Any suggestions?
    Send him a letter. Like this guy:

    http://www.thepoke.co.uk/2012/05/23/...er-of-the-day/
    Tantricle is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 12-06-2017, 03:06 PM   #786
    camptravisr
    Numbered Beats
     
    camptravisr's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2009
    Location: Indianapolis
    Posts: 1,691

    Shows Seen: 33

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Tantricle View Post
    this is great. Ended up being a satirical piece, but still a fantastic read.
    camptravisr is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 12-06-2017, 06:15 PM   #787
    cry_minarets458
    MM#45 Wacco for Flacco
     
    cry_minarets458's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2007
    Location: Give me BETHEL or give me death.... death, death it is then
    Posts: 20,890

    Shows Seen: 62

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    I always get excited when I see this thread topped. Then I get disappointed
    __________________
    Mao's WWYS Quest: fin @ show 39 MattsMarching 1 Gorge Medal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by efraser77 View Post
    *renounces DMB fandom*
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Prime Minister
    In fairness Brian Wilson's Beard > Amy Winehouse & the grammys & spoot.
    cry_minarets458 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 12-07-2017, 03:39 PM   #788
    Beefsteak1138
    Shut the fuck up Howell
     
    Beefsteak1138's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Posts: 74,014

    Shows Seen: 10

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Hahahaha, thought of this thread the other day. Best thread.
    __________________
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
    i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
    Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 12-10-2017, 09:12 PM   #789
    Noles20
    Go Birds!
     
    Noles20's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Sep 2003
    Location: Montgomery County, PA
    Posts: 19,489

    Shows Seen: 23

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    If only this had lasted long enough for technology to have a real impact. One of those ring doorbell cameras would have surprised the hell out of the trash can mover!
    __________________
    (sb)
    Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes, but I'll work it out.
    Noles20 is online now   Reply With Quote
    Old 12-11-2017, 02:00 PM   #790
    Ascf33
    Pure Class
     
    Join Date: Jul 2003
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    Posts: 37,968

    Shows Seen: 21

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    I love this thread so much.
    Ascf33 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 02-01-2018, 01:20 PM   #791
    scrock25
    Jesus fucking Christ
     
    scrock25's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2002
    Posts: 68,380

    Shows Seen: 24

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by DIDriveOut2SPAC View Post
    Burn his house down.
    scrock25 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 02-02-2018, 09:50 AM   #792
    Beefsteak1138
    Shut the fuck up Howell
     
    Beefsteak1138's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Posts: 74,014

    Shows Seen: 10

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Cunt....
    __________________
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
    i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
    Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 02-02-2018, 03:30 PM   #793
    scrock25
    Jesus fucking Christ
     
    scrock25's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2002
    Posts: 68,380

    Shows Seen: 24

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    I hope she get's foreclosed on.
    scrock25 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 02-08-2018, 09:48 AM   #794
    Beefsteak1138
    Shut the fuck up Howell
     
    Beefsteak1138's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Posts: 74,014

    Shows Seen: 10

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Somebody was killed in my old neighborhood last year. It starts off small with trespassing and theft of trash cans and other petty crimes, then quickly escalates to murder.
    __________________
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
    i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
    Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-01-2018, 08:28 PM   #795
    rconverse
     
    rconverse's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Location: It's how, not where. I live to dance!
    Posts: 68,025

    Shows Seen: 25

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Almost started a trash can war at my new place, which even knowing this thread existed never thought could actually happen. Luckily, I was able to take a breath and go another route before escalating the situation.
    __________________
    Official **TTTSS(NPA:NT)** Record: W - ∞, L - 1
    rconverse is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-02-2018, 12:22 PM   #796
    Beefsteak1138
    Shut the fuck up Howell
     
    Beefsteak1138's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Posts: 74,014

    Shows Seen: 10

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    We need some more deets here, Raj.
    __________________
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
    i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
    Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-02-2018, 01:19 PM   #797
    Ascf33
    Pure Class
     
    Join Date: Jul 2003
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    Posts: 37,968

    Shows Seen: 21

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    yes, explain.
    Ascf33 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-03-2018, 03:51 PM   #798
    Ascf33
    Pure Class
     
    Join Date: Jul 2003
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    Posts: 37,968

    Shows Seen: 21

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    goddamnit i need the story.
    Ascf33 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-09-2018, 10:54 AM   #799
    Beefsteak1138
    Shut the fuck up Howell
     
    Beefsteak1138's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2003
    Posts: 74,014

    Shows Seen: 10

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    Biggest blue balls in Ant's history?
    __________________
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay View Post
    i wish i lived in a time where it was acceptable to have sex with kids.
    Beefsteak1138 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Old 04-10-2018, 10:27 AM   #800
    Ascf33
    Pure Class
     
    Join Date: Jul 2003
    Location: Raleigh, NC
    Posts: 37,968

    Shows Seen: 21

    Re: Need Ant's help in effing with douchebag neighbor

    yeah, seriously.
    Ascf33 is offline   Reply With Quote
    Reply

    Bookmarks

    Tags
    backread; then die; , no waves no tod

    Thread Tools
    Display Modes

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is On
    HTML code is Off

    Forum Jump


    Want to hide all ads on Ants? Click here

    All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:06 PM.


    Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.6
    Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.


       
    Site LinksAbout AntsAnts MobileTweet Tweet
    Home
    Ants+
    Tour Central
    Search bar
    RSS Feeds
    About Us
    Contact Us
    The Ants Blog
    Advertise on Ants
    Privacy Policy
    Ants on your cell phone
    iAnts
    mobile news
    mobile setlists
    antslive!
    Ants' Twitter
    DMBLive Twitter
    Matt's Twitter
    Jake's Twitter
    Joe's Twitter