Have You Ever Got Caught Masturbating?

[bigeyedfish190]

Originally Posted by jackbauer0041

A girl at my high school years back masturbated with a hot dog at school and it got snapped in half inside her.

She went to the nurse and had to go to the hospital to get it taken out.

Um...Laingsburg High?

The hot dog thing must be some kinda urban legend, cause there's no way it's a common thing, and there's no way someone on ants actually went to my 400 person high school.

[comerelaxnow]

Originally Posted by The Mango

give us the storiez man.

Walked in on my roommate just going to town on himself watching some cheap porn flick he got in the mail. It was funny.

But the best time was when i walked in on my friend who is a girl and she had one of those dildos that have the suctioncup on the bottom so you can stick it to the floor and ride it. She was so embarressed and it may have been the single greatest moment in my life....She and i had a sexual relationship years before that so its nothing i haven't seen before but she was still embarrassed

[snow1868]

Originally Posted by comerelaxnow

Walked in on my roommate just going to town on himself watching some cheap porn flick he got in the mail. It was funny.

But the best time was when i walked in on my friend who is a girl and she had one of those dildos that have the suctioncup on the bottom so you can stick it to the floor and ride it. She was so embarressed and it may have been the single greatest moment in my life....She and i had a sexual relationship years before that so its nothing i haven't seen before but she was still embarrassed

Ah-mazing. I have no idea what I would say if I walked in on some chick going to town like that. Hahaha.

[AlexK79]

A few years back I was roommates with a good female friend of mine. We both worked at the same place, and I was scheduled working late on the shipment crew one night. I wasn't supposed to get off (heh) until 1:00 AM, but we finished early and left around midnight. We lived in a townhouse that was really narrow, but had 3 levels. Her bedroom was upstairs, the kitchen and living room on the ground floor, and my bedroom in the basement.

I walked in the door a little after midnight to hear her moaning at the top of her lungs, and the slight hum of the vibrator. She heard me shut the door behind me and I heard her try to cover it up by feigning laughter, as if she had seen something funny on TV. Except her TV wasn't on.

We never spoke of it but I know she knows I heard! Lol.

[GinaNMU]

I have been caught having sex, but never masturbating. One of my old roommates in college (a good friend actually) used to use the LOUDEST f'in massager when she'd get herself off at night. There were nights where my boyfriend and I could hear it from all the way across the hall with both our doors closed. It was hilarious She is a pretty shameless girl though, so it was fun to give her shit about the next day.

[The Mango]

Originally Posted by comerelaxnow

Walked in on my roommate just going to town on himself watching some cheap porn flick he got in the mail. It was funny.

But the best time was when i walked in on my friend who is a girl and she had one of those dildos that have the suctioncup on the bottom so you can stick it to the floor and ride it. She was so embarressed and it may have been the single greatest moment in my life....She and i had a sexual relationship years before that so its nothing i haven't seen before but she was still embarrassed

damn dude...damn. that is hot shit.

[jackbauer0041]

Originally Posted by bigeyedfish190

Um...Laingsburg High?

The hot dog thing must be some kinda urban legend, cause there's no way it's a common thing, and there's no way someone on ants actually went to my 400 person high school.

I'm pretty sure it's a true story, it definitely could've happened twice.

But no, I do not go to Laingsburg High.

[TSilk]

my roommate freshmen year walked in on me sitting in his prized computer chair (the kid was a WoW fanatic and a complete weirdo) getting a drunken handjob from a chick I hooked up with a few times, he then stormed out with his Nerf gun and didn't come back for the rest of the night.

Edit: I also forgot to add I've never been caught solo but I've passed out many a time with my junk hanging out and been discovered the next morning

[mcwyffe]

i am fucking masterbating right now.

[GSUdawg521]

Originally Posted by bigeyedfish190

Um...Laingsburg High?

The hot dog thing must be some kinda urban legend, cause there's no way it's a common thing, and there's no way someone on ants actually went to my 400 person high school.

Yeah i heard that one too back when I was too young to even know what it meant.

[The Mango]

Originally Posted by mcwyffe

i am fucking masterbating right now.

same! no, i'm just kidding actually...

[Ashley J]

Originally Posted by The Mango

same! no, i'm just kidding actually...

***The Official I'm Masturbating but still posting on AM Thread***

[trautwein.m]

Originally Posted by mcwyffe

i am fucking masterbating right now.

sigged cause i'm drunk

lolol

[JRod1229]

Originally Posted by GSUdawg521

Yeah this thread was done not long ago. Because I know a certain someone's story who was caught and the punchline is his dad walking in and saying something like as if to say "you would!" But I'll let him tell it...

I was never really caught jerking it per se, but I'll admit getting caught with my junk out. It was freshman year, tiny dorm room. It was just that time in the morning when you're waking up with some really good morning wood. I was still in bed and just rubbing and stuff, not really planning on an all-out session, just bc it was early and felt good. Looked over and noticed my roommate had like rolled over and looked at me like "wtf" so I put it away and went on with my day.

But I did catch him not longer after that. He came in late and thought I was asleep but I was just getting there. After settling in I realized I heard this shuffling under the cover sound. It was fast and kinda sporadic, like no way I've ever jerked it before. But I knew what it was and it was real awkward, so after a while I broke the darkness with "havin fun over there???" and the room went completely silent. I think I kinda laughed and rolled over and went to sleep.

He also came out of the closet after freshman year so hopefully my getting caught the week or so earlier wasn't his focus that night.

Go fuck yourself...

[GSUdawg521]

Originally Posted by JRod1229

Go fuck yourself...

[Tomriddle]

Originally Posted by Jake

I'm on a masterbation memory lane.... must've been the haiku's.

best sentence ever.

[Kevinbstbll9]

I've gotton caught masturbating way too many times, gotton caught with my hand up my then-girlfriend's shirt and down her pants, getting a blowjob (that was recent ). I'm really not lucky at all

[The Mango]

Originally Posted by Kevinbstbll9

I've gotton caught masturbating way too many times, gotton caught with my hand up my then-girlfriend's shirt and down her pants, getting a blowjob (that was recent ). I'm really not lucky at all

[Kevinbstbll9]

Originally Posted by The Mango

Yeah it was horrible at the time but now it's funny!

OH WOW.

Okay so I got caught by a girl's dad when my dick was in her mouth. Yeah... I've been caught getting blowjobs more than once.

We were watching Dawn of the Dead (very classy I know) and she started to give me a blowjob. And her dad walks downstairs, sees what's going on. She quickly puts my dick back in my pants. Then her dad calls her into the kitchen (doesn't even acknowledge me, I think he wanted to me.) She gets yelled at, the dad goes back upstairs. She then preceeds to come over to me and ask me if I want to finish what we started downstairs...

It was really cool to tell my friends that.

[cwsrule88]

Originally Posted by TSilk

my roommate freshmen year walked in on me sitting in his prized computer chair (the kid was a WoW fanatic and a complete weirdo) getting a drunken handjob from a chick I hooked up with a few times, he then stormed out with his Nerf gun and didn't come back for the rest of the night.

Edit: I also forgot to add I've never been caught solo but I've passed out many a time with my junk hanging out and been discovered the next morning

that made the story for me

[Kevinbstbll9]

^ I started a big nerf gun war last year on one of the dormatory floors. It was awesome

[Resatka]

Great thread. That was actually a hilarious read.

[Carbon Copy]

Originally Posted by Ashley J

***The Official I'm Masturbating but still posting on AM Thread***

Yeah, i'll do this

[Barbossa]

Originally Posted by OlivePoet

I think the mini freak out was due to the fact that you were in her bed.

heater, i hart you.

[evjens]

there was a "rumor" at my school in about 9th grade about a girl and a whisk. except now we know it's not a rumor because a few people asked her and whenever it's brought up when she's around she just goes "oh shut up!" and does that dumb 'oh i'm mad but i'm smiling' thing. it's pretty funny though because in high school whenever someone mentioned a whisk, everyone would kind of giggle. i think the entire class knew about it. she was gross though.

[Barbossa]

Originally Posted by evjens

there was a "rumor" at my school in about 9th grade about a girl and a whisk. except now we know it's not a rumor because a few people asked her and whenever it's brought up when she's around she just goes "oh shut up!" and does that dumb 'oh i'm mad but i'm smiling' thing. it's pretty funny though because in high school whenever someone mentioned a whisk, everyone would kind of giggle. i think the entire class knew about it. she was gross though.

the business side of a whisk doesn't look too comfortable.

[fridge112887]

A friend of mine came back from class to notice his current roommate going to town to the weather channel. Don't get me wrong, I get excited about a sunny, 80 degree forecast and all, but nothing that makes me want to beat off.

[TempHelpNeeded]

Sadly, yes. And it's ruining my life.

[JTRocks]

someone posted this video on the boards here way back when, but it has everything to do with the topic of this thread. make sure you watch it till the end for the real punchline. dont worry, its on youtube, so you're not gonna see anythng you dont wanna see:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqcZiY3xriI

[jackbauer0041]

Originally Posted by TempHelpNeeded

Sadly, yes. And it's ruining my life.