Re: What made you happy today?
You wanna know the only thing that made me happy today? No? Well, too bad, fuck yourself, you're going to hear it anyway.
Today, I spent 40 minutes on the shitter uninterrupted at work and took one of the most fulfilling work dumps of my life. I had Moes last night, Hardees for breakfast, and Chinese for lunch so the international incident brewing in my bowels couldn't wait anymore. I kept thinking, this is the dump that never ends. I listened to Spotify, wasted time on Facebook, rubbed one out, and then, for no particular reason, I was done. Even with the commercial strength toilet it was a two flusher. It's good to know, that somewhere in the sewers, the 5lb biddy I birthed out of my sphincter will go on to have a better life than me.
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{Chris}
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